Senseless Post

It's 1 of the worst day ever.

I've got no goddamn idea why am I so EMO/PISSED/MOODY for the whole day(yes, that's how I felt even though I might not have show it). Maybe because I've got not enough sleeps?

After the Kluang(Johor) performance yesterday, reach home about 1.40am, then slept around 3.30am, woke up around 4.45am.

Drove to KLIA to sent my lovely friend away (might be another reason why am I so EMO, LOL), drove all the way back ALONE for the 1st time. but of, I get to try and drive up to 190km/hr for like, 10sec? I was worrying that the petrol will die out on me anytime, but luckily it doesn't.

Back at home, face comp, slept for while, lunch, go to Uni.

back from Uni, go straight to UCSI for practice... after that went to makan with Johan and gang. Yeap, they're fun, they're adorable :)

Thanks to them I feel so friggin much better than I was before.

That babi Yuki is still so BABI! Won't pick up my call when I need someone to talk to (hope she won't see this). xD

Ah well, that ends my day.

26mins to go 'til 'Merdeka'. A friend asked me on fb just now, "How you gonna celebrate Merdeka?".

Well, good question. I would like to know the answer if anyone can provide me one.

24mins 'til 'Merdeka'...

That's it.

p/s:
I'm glad that Esien made it to Japan safely :)
I haven't done my accounting assignment that's due on Weds.
Have to rush up all the duet/quartet pieces before Saturday...
I think I've only slept for less than 3hrs (included lectures) today?

-11.36pm-

If U're in a relationship, married or none, read this. U'll know why at the end.

I don't know whether this or the Chinese version is the original, but it is truly worth a few seconds to share it and 5 minutes in your life to read it-- it might just save you from 'regret' before it's too late.

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MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.

So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. Matthew 19:6.

By Stephanie Halmilton

 

-3.15am-

爱上两个人的感觉……？

在 Facebook 里看见了一篇文章，标题是： 《爱上两个人的感觉》。

读完后，就觉得…… 不是吧？！这样的文章只会让夹在两个人中间的那个人更痛苦，更不知所措！

这样的情况/感觉，多数只会出现在女人身上吧？因为，只有多数的男生才会毫不犹豫地追求自己喜欢的女生，即使她身边有另一个人也好。

或许有点文不对题，但在你（不论男女）有着这一份感觉时，你可曾顾虑那两个你所谓 ‘爱着’ 的人的感受？

个人觉得，没有一段真爱是无须经过考验的。如果现在觉得身边的那位不是自己想要的，而身边又有另一个更好的，干脆点分手又有何不可？与其长痛不如短痛吧？同时能把时间花在另一个更好的身上，何乐而不为？

许多人看到这里都会觉得“你说得容易！大家在一起那么久了还是会有感情啊！说分就分？”。少给自己借口吧朋友！不爱就不爱了，别浪费时间把自己绑在一段没结果的感情，害人害己。如果还在乎另一半的感觉，那就分得干脆些，让对方早点复原以便能找到他的幸福不是更好么？

觉得自私吗？那先问问自己吧！有那段感情不是 ‘自私’ 的？有人会说，“我对他的爱是无私的、不求回报的！”。但就在 ‘无私奉献’ 的时候，你难道不是在期望着他的幸福吗？那也是一种 ‘自私’ 吧？

自己的幸福永远都是最重要的。在感情里，‘自私’无罪！

愿天下有情人终成眷属~

等等，好像忘了什么………………………………………………………………………………

糟糕！功课还没做完哪~~~ >____<"

-2.00am-